• If you do a thorough check of your trailer before hauling, your truck will break down.

• There is no such thing as a sterile barn cat.

• No one ever notices how you ride until you fall off.

• The least useful horse in your barn will eat the most, require shoes every four weeks and need the vet at least once a month.

• Tack you hate never wears out, blankets you hate cannot be destroyed, horses you hate cannot be sold and will outlive you.

• One horse isn’t enough, two is too many.

• Clipper blades will become dull only when the horse is half finished. Clipper motors will quit only when you have the horse’s head left to trim.

• If you’re wondering if you left the water running in the barn, you did.

• If you’re wondering if you latched the pasture gate, you didn’t.

• If a horse is advertised "under $5,000", you can bet he isn’t $2,500.

• If you approach within 50 feet of the barn in your "street clothes", you will get dirty.

• You can’t push on a lunge line.

• A horse’s misbehavior will be in direct proportion to the number of people who are watching.

• The number of horses you own increases according to the number of stalls in your barn.

• An uncomplicated horse can be ruined with enough schooling.

• You can’t run a barn without baling twine.

• Hoof picks migrate.

• Wind velocity increases in direct proportion to how well your hat fits.

• If you fall off, you will land on the site of your most recent injury.

• If you’re winning – quit.